Has anything good ever come from NFTs? Except Christopher Moltisanti meme (opens in a new tab), I mean. I really can’t think of anything. The functionality they offer games is technically different from what has been available for years through conventional microtransaction sales, but it’s practically the same for non-gamers as financial speculators, and the whole business of making, buying and selling them. is overrun by corruption and crime. “A useless, expensive, ecologically destructive technology,” is how the French trade union Solidaires Informatique (opens in a new tab) described it and I have no notes.
I myself have a rather simple approach to the whole thing: No thanks. It’s served me well so far, because I haven’t been drained of money by fast-talking scammers selling bad scraps, nor have I missed out on any gaming experiences that could even be described as compelling. Tfue card (opens in a new tab)? Tiny little numbers (opens in a new tab) on my Tom Clancy helmet? Atari (opens in a new tab)? No thanks. See, it’s simple.
Somehow it keeps happening. Money goes in, and for any number of reasons – crime, incompetence, the fact that NFTs are inherently worthless digital eras no different than horse armor (opens in a new tab) that set the gaming world on fire with rage in 2006 – heartbreak comes out. 2022 was no exception.
Blockverse is breaking
Blockburst, an unofficial game to earn Minecraft game sells out the first NFT offering, then splits
The year started with a bang, although it was really more of a puff: In February, Blockverse, an unofficial game to earn Minecraft NFT game, walked away with more than $1.2 million (opens in a new tab), just a couple of days after selling out the initial offering of 10,000 NFTs in under eight minutes. Blockverse founders emerged a few days later to proclaim that all was well, all was well, and there was nothing to worry about, but of course there was a lot to worry about. A promise that the development would soon “get back on track” never materialized, and neither did the money.
Axie Infinity forgets to change the code
Hackers linked to North Korea take advantage of a security lapse to make off with $617 in crypto
Blockverse’s million-dollar rug pull would look like a switch just a month later, when an Axie Infinity techno botch allowed hackers to make off with more than $617 million (opens in a new tab) in cryptocurrency. It’s complicated, but the short analogy version is that after an NFT giveaway campaign, someone forgot to change their access permissions, and shortly thereafter, a shitload of money went out the door.
It was a screw up, not a rug pull, but the net result was the same: A lot of people lost a lot of money because an unscrupulous d-bag decided he wanted it. The US government finally pointed the finger at North Korea (opens in a new tab); some of the stolen funds were refunded and Axie Infinity eventually returned to action, but the token price is now well below where it was before the heist.
F1 Delta Time runs out of gas
F1 Delta Time, one of the first NFT games, loses its license, players lose their cars
F1 Delta time (opens in a new tab) was not the victim of either a blanket sweep or incompetence, but it demonstrated the inherent worthlessness of NFTs. Launched in 2019 as one of the first ever licensed NFT games, it actually produced the “most expensive NFT” that year, a diamond-encrusted F1 car (actually just a fairly low-quality rendering) called 1-1 -1. However, in March 2022, F1 closed Delta Time after losing its F1 license and these NFTs were basically gone. Developer Animoca offered various types of compensation for the now useless “assets,” including “proxy assets” that “will be used in the future to get NFTs for products across the REVV Motorsport ecosystem.” But given that the entire existence of NFTs is digital permanence, you’d be forgiven for wondering, well, “Dude, where’s my car?”
Untamed islands sink into the sea
The crypto crash destroys crowdfunded MMO Untamed Isles, and there’s no money left for refunds
The crowd-funded MMO Untamed Isles was a huge success on Kickstarter, reaching more than four times its NZ$200,000 ($127,000) goal. It had somewhat less success in the real world. In August, developers put the project “on pause,” blaming the 2022 crypto crash for their woes. Naturally, there was no money left over for refunds either, resulting in some seriously unhappy feedback from backers on Kickstarter. Developer Phat Loot Studios said they are “looking at ways to save both the core studio and the game so it can be completed and released,” but there has been no further update since then on the Untamed Isles website (opens in a new tab)Kickstarter (opens in a new tab)or Steam (opens in a new tab) page.
CNN is closing the vault
CNN is ending its Vault NFT program, abandoning the promise of “exclusive CNN benefits” and the ability to create your own NFTs based on CNN articles
CNN’s Vault NFT program, launched in June 2021, offered “digital collectibles” that were essentially jpg images of “key historical moments” pulled from the archives. It also offered a built-in system to buy and trade (i.e. monetize) its NFTs, through “a variety of sales formats including both open and limited editions.” But in October it said goodbye to it all, prompting widespread cries of “rug pull” from NFT owners. It wasn’t, in the strictest sense, because the NFTs still exist: You bought an NFT, you got an NFT. But other parts of the closure are sketchy: The road map for 2022 (opens in a new tab)still available on the Vault website, teased everything from a new Photography for Change series of NFTs to “exclusive CNN benefits for Vault collectors” and the ability to create NFTs based on any CNN article you want – all this went away without warning.
Seth Green’s monkeys are gone, so back home
Seth Green falls for a con artist and then pays $300,000 to get one of his stupid ugly monkeys back
Seth Green, known for playing the likes of Normandy pilot Jeff “Joker” Moreau in the Mass Effect games, pulled his own rug in June when he spent nearly $300,000 to regain ownership of a Bored Ape NFT that he had been scammed with. out of last month. I can’t imagine ever being rich enough to drop the price of a Ferrari on a low quality monkey, but if I am, I hope I have enough taste (or basic common sense) not to.
pic.twitter.com/lp5JWr762P17 May 2022
40,000 years in prison
Alleged NFT carpet puller faces prison term long enough to encompass entire Warhammer 40,000 timeline
The collapse of the crypto exchange Thodex in April 2021 resulted in losses of more than $2.5 billion, and the founder, Faruk Fatih Özer, left for Albania with millions of dollars stolen from the company. He was eventually stopped and ordered extradited to Turkey to stand trial. If convicted, he faces up to 40,564 years in prison, which by my calculations means he could be out just in time to join the 14th Black Crusade.
